Run Report 1521: West Hanger CP, Nr Clandon

Get me to the church on time!
Scribed by Sparkly

Assembled in timely fashion were Pis’t’man Pat, Billy Graham, Scooby Doo, El Caudello, Tea Cosy, Moondance, Robic, ‘New Ben’, Man in Black (with 4-legged companion Moss), Sorry John with his two 4-legged friends Elsie and Shwiffy, and your scribe. The speaking clock’s attention was diverted by enquiries from a would-be hasher so it was just after 11 when we set off, following the direction of the hare’s wave of a hand. He had placed a circle in the centre of the car park with the intention of laying a few more false trails from it when he finished setting, but as several of us were already there by then he had to abandon that idea. Good thing he did really as he caught both Billy Graham and Sorry John out on a long falsie at the first true circle. And apparently Moondance and Tea Cosy might have even run round the perpetual circle set by the hare round an empty water carrier! Meanwhile, Sparkly and Scooby Doo forged ahead on the correct trail and BG was left lagging for quite some time playing catch up, and as for SJ – well – read on!

The lead kept changing – mainly between Tea Cosy and Scooby Doo. I lost count of the number of times each re-over took me from their explorations of falsies, and they were setting a brisk pace! Just as well as many of us were hoping for a timely finish so we could refresh ourselves in time for the 2pm church nuptials of Sophie & Nic in Wonersh.

I can often tell who is coming up behind me, about to over-take. Clues are provided by a certain lightness/heaviness of foot, or tempo, or in PP’s case heavy breathing! But now we have another ‘blower’ – as ‘New Ben’ overtook me I noticed his blow-by-blow efforts and wondered if it was a tempo strategy that perhaps I should adopt – so many running steps to make yourself take per forced exhalation! I also noticed him drinking frequently from his CamelBak hydration pack – sensible chap! Hawkeye has challenged us to come up with a proper Hash name for Ben, so having given this some thought, I propose ‘Water American’ after his namesake Benjamin Franklin. Here’s why: While working in a print shop during his first voyage to England, Franklin consumed large amounts of water, even though his European counterparts primarily drank beer. Thus, Franklin earned the nickname, “Water American.”

Or how about ‘Blowfly’ the more he blows the faster he flies (runs)!

Once he got so far ahead for me not to hear his breathing I began pondering where Sorry John had got to as he hadn’t preceded us by much at the start. I concluded that he was ‘doing his own thing’ when he and his 2 spaniels suddenly appeared ahead of us, but coming at us. In his own words Sorry John provided the following explanation:
“A lovely run, enjoyed it albeit the wrong way round. Took the right hand trail at the first circle, ran the cross and ended up on the in-trial. Couldn’t be **ed to go back so carried on round in reverse. None of the circle kicking made sense though!

If you want to see a hash come to a full stop then all you need is someone running back down a trail when they are some 300yds from the nearest circle, looks of ‘have we just missed the cross’ and ‘*** that for a long falsie!’ were on their faces.

There I was on the very last leg of the trail, running back along the road when I passed a group of walkers, just got passed and I was called back, so I stopped and went back. One of the guys in the group knew about hashing and had just explained it all to a sceptical friend from Holland, when all of a sudden along comes this aged runner with a Pis’toff’en T shirt.”


VERDICT: As ever, nothing less than expected from our GM who frequently proves his worth by filling the hare gaps at short notice, as on this occasion. We had great weather; the terrain was kind (no hills to speak of), soft underfoot and a smattering of avoidable mud and all over within the hour. At times we were well strung out, but he cannily got us back together again with clever and cunning circles and falsies, and even used paths new to the group and even more impressively to Tea Cosy, whose stomping ground this is! That pleased the hare no end!

AT THE PUB [scribed by Hawkeye]: Even with a wedding to attend, as hare it was my duty to attend the pub after the run and keep PP, El Caudello and Scooby Doo company. We didn’t get chips but did manage to sample a couple of ales – Spring Ale and PP even tried the new Hogsback Cider (Hazy Hog) by accident. The weather was warm enough in the weak sunshine to sit outside and being a party of four we didn’t struggle for a seat, or conversation.


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