Run Report 1919:Hollowdene Recreation Ground, Shortfield Common Road, Nr Frensham

The perfect wedding shower……

Scribed by Hawkeye

Lockdown continues to ease and having spent a year on the sofa to save lives and protect the NHS, it was high time to leave the sofa… save my life and protect the NHS. April showers had also dutifully respected social distancing but had been making up for lost time in May. Time to Frensham things up a little. With some or other similar justification (or just sympathy for bedraggled hares) Robin Hood, 3s4d, Lady Chatterley, Call Girl, Sparkly, Wally, Prince Charming, Cinderella, Hawkeye, Secret Squirrel,  Pis’t’man Pat, Easily Overlooked, Tea Cosy, Sorry John and TIFM arrived at Shortfield Common Road. EO was one of the last to arrive, which was surprising considering the venue….

The following hour tested some/all of the following myths:

  • It never rains between 11 and 12 on a Sunday.
  • Interbreeding between hashers is alive and ‘well’.
  • Tea Cosy can be early for a run
  • Covid is not transmissible through torrential downpours
  • PP remains in full control of his faculties if not his liver
  • The Tufty Club survives – for some
  • Frensham with its ponds etc., is largely flat

Read on to find out which ones.

We were promised a sub 5 mile trail, wildlife and a regroup. Running the touchline we passed the offside of the football pitch and were away. Within five minutes we had successfully crossed the main road onto the heath. I am pleased to report that Secret Squirrel still holds his Tufty Club badge, less so Policeman Badger who’s lifeless form was the ‘wildlife’ referred to by the hares. Not a good omen for the run ahead.

Running ahead was Prince Charming who with youth and local knowledge on his side, was a force to be reckoned with. But first of all we had to reckon with the novelty of running in a group of over six people – albeit suitably distanced. This we accomplished seemingly seamlessly even hovering over circles like a well-oiled machine. The early section was accomplished in torrential rain that somehow grew stronger as we climbed to the high ground and an al fresco marked regroup with a panoramic of the great pond/lake below.

For some reason this brought forth a ditty about the Duke of Buckingham from Secret Squirrel. Maybe it was the onset of hypothermia as despite being mid-May and just before midday, soaked to the skin the regroup was distinctly chilly. But joy unbridled is a woman in love and Lady Chatterley chose this moment to announce her recent betrothal to 3s4d. Brief cheers and clapped/chapped hands ensued before, for safety’s sake we moved on.

I took a falsie as we tipped over the crest of the hill and never saw Prince Charming again. But the entertainment proceeded nonetheless. Descending the hill just ahead of the tongue of water that was turning the path into a stream, I joined the pack as it wove alongside the Pond/Pond Road and emerged by the hotel. Next up we encountered PH3’s very own Mary Poppins e.g. TIFM jogging with a golf umbrella!

Closing out a half lap of the lake my legs and lungs felt it was time to turn for home. TC already had and in the company of SS we encountered some wildlife (thankfully in rude health) in the shape of lambs and bullocks as we crossed the meadows towards St Mary the Virgin and some rather bucolic scenery as we climbed up from the river, to the playing field and home.

VERDICT: Rumour has it that Robic suffered from a last minute cancellation, but Moondance looked a natural as the plus one. And as foretold the run length of 5.1m (include some of the predicted long falsies) covered in c56min – was just what we like. We also like cake and in celebration of the announcement LC (for I assume it was not 3s4d) conjured up our necessary sugar fix.

POST RUN CONVERSATION: the rain had abated but temperatures remained low until full past 12noon when the sun came out (see myth busting below) and we relaxed like lizards in search of solar gain. This allowed us to catch up (physically and verbally) with PC and Cinderella on local housing developments and explore PP’s future plans in that regard. I think CG and Sparkly were absent for the photoshoot but more importantly present for the cake. And then the rains came again…..

So many thanks Robic and Moondance and what of those myths, well……….

  • It never rains between 11 and 12 on a Sunday – myth busted!
  • Interbreeding between hashers is alive and ‘well’ – with nuptials planned – apparently so.
  • Tea Cosy can be early for a run – True, but only because he took a lift to get there
  • Covid is not transmissible through torrential downpours – the jury’s still out, but hopefully not!
  • PP remains in full control of his faculties if not his liver – seemingly so……..
  • The Tufty Club survives, for some – True.
  • Frensham with its ponds etc., is largely flat – largely busted.

On on.

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