Run Report 1965: The Bricklayers Arms, Shamley Green

Brilliantly unprincipled….

Scribed by Hawkeye

The chances of securing the services of a bricklayer in 2022 remain pretty low, but thankfully the possibility of a post-run beer at the Bricklayers Arms remains high. With such expectations, a thirsty pack arrived in Shamley Green for a punctual start – even Tea Cosy was ten minutes early. In truth the foretold roadworks (that did not actually materialize) prodded people into earlier than usual activity. To trail in TCs wake were Sparkly, Wally, ITB, Cynthia, Dusty, Hawkeye, TIFM, Robin Hood, Venus, Call Girl and Sorry John.

And Shamley was green and soaking up the light rain that began to fall. On the weekend that BoJo rolled back the rules on BOGOFs (Buy One Get One Free), PH3 persisted with its own version of using two hares for one run; Secret Squirrel and ah, um, er her name escapes me for now. Not sure what you get for that extra hare, certainly not in the briefing anyway – but we set off to test out the trail ahead. Having arrived from Farley Heath I had inadvertently witnessed some markings that turned out to be the outbound trail, in any case we were following the premature start of TIFM.

We looped up across the fields towards the church where the eagle-eyed were able to spot a Buzzard. If you are buzzard eyed, I have no idea what you saw. Across the road the tempo lifted as the rain didn’t and the pack spread out and headed South. I think there was some Wey & Arun canal involved and I’m pretty certain we crossed the Run Common Road before reaching the Downs Link where TIFM took TC onto a falsie and TC then missed a cross. The pack headed north dodging cyclist like a computer arcade game of old.

There had already been some (valid) grumblings about the state of kicking, and I redoubled my efforts to do less badly from here on, I know my abilities. Dusty was on a flyer and left us for…dust as we headed back under Run Common Road and to an eventual right turn where we headed into some welcome woods/shade/shelter from the rain and a small climb to make a voluntary regroup. The next thing I remember we were back on the Downs Link in furious pursuit of Dusty and TC before taking a turn (for the better) on the edge of Bramley towards Westland Farm.

At this point TC and I – having kicked a circle then run to a cross only to find that Dusty had ignored our invitation and was now well advanced again(!) – discussed the metaphysical nature of hashing. When is it right to kick a circle, or not? If you kick a circle and no one is there to see you, did it happen. Can a circle simultaneously be kicked and not-kicked aka ‘Schrodinger’s Circle’. Snapping out of such reverie we then set about catching the very real person in front of us….again.

Lords Hill Common looks like a fine place for a pub and despite my hunch that the imposing house on the green must have been one in the past, in fact Lords Hill House was a shop as per local records “Lords Hill Common was once called Parsons Common. The Parson needed a horse to get about and it had to graze somewhere. The Cokelers built Lords Hill House as their commercial centre with bakery and butchers behind the grocery and emporium for hardware and haberdashery”. Once again on the green, Dusty (aka Mr Parsons) gave us the slip, but in the end, TC was not to be denied and a concertinaed pack came jogging in across the cricket field as a disconsolate groundsman looked at the work, he’d put into preparing the wicket only for it to go to waste in the rain. A bit like how my run had felt…

VERDICT: A cracking run guys, to a plan no doubt set out by Dusty(!), the Downs Link sections were a leg stretcher and a tad more sawdust on the circles to re-mark my many failed attempts wouldn’t have gone amiss, but it was a good stretch out before the real rain came. Many thanks SS and….who was that again?, anyway many thanks SS.

UNDER THE RAINY GAZEBO: Sunday lunch was in full swing in the pub, but the hares commandeered a palatial gazebo – perfect for our needs. Sadly, no chips were available, but this disappointment was partially offset by the fine Shere Drop and less-admired Harvey’s Best, a mistake TIFM didn’t make the second time. To be clear by now Dusty had confessed that his bike journey to the venue had taken him along the Downs Link and via Westland Farm – doh! During other exchanges we learned that Wally once hoovered the Queens bedroom, SS had his (not so secret) stash of sawdust stolen/vandalised on the run today and that he was once described as ‘Brilliantly unprincipled’ by none other than the Daily Telegraph. I’ll leave you to guess what that referred to. As the rain increased from a steady drip drip, we all departed to consume the vegetables grown by Cynthia and ITB with Easily Overlooked of all people somehow managing to bang her head on a hanging basket. Now remind me, what was she doing at this run…….On on!

Leave a Reply